Causes and Motivations of Child Misbehavior

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There are probably as many answers to “What causes child misbehavior?” as there are children.

To say that one factor alone is the sole cause of misbehavior would be misguided and highly inaccurate. 

There are usually a handful of biological, psychological, and environmental factors that combine to influence a child’s potential for causes of misbehavior.

For many children, negative attention is better than no attention at all. If your child appears to be acting out for the purpose of gaining attention, then the solution is simple:  GIVE YOUR CHILD MORE ATTENTION – but do so when he or she is behaving appropriately.  Also, be sure to…

• Acknowledge your child when he or she is being positive.
• Get to know your child by spending more time talking and asking non-intrusive questions.
• Devote a segment of time each day to spend quality time together.
• Ignore behaviors that are meant to annoy – such as whining, mocking, complaining, begging, pouting, etc.

Many negative behaviors are brought about by the need of the child to exert power and/or control over others. 

Some of the more common behaviors of children motivated by power and control are: dawdling, picky eating, bossiness, always having to be “first,” passive-aggressiveness, threatening, engaging in power struggles, etc. These children will typically respond better when given choices rather than demands. 

Choices allow children to “control” what happens.  Gaining insight into the influences and/or motivations of your child’s misbehavior will certainly help you to better handle these behaviors as you are confronted with them. Start by minimizing the negative environmental factors in your child’s life to the extent that you can. Next, consider having your child assessed for biological and/ or psychological problems, if necessary.

Remember to keep the lines of communication open and take the time that is needed to care for yourself. Help is only a phone call or support group away!