Your Child's Problem Behavior: Getting to the Root of the Problem
1. | How long has the behavior been a problem? |
2. | How often is the behavior a problem? |
3. | On a scale of 1-10, how severe is the problem behavior? |
4. | Is the problem behavior situation-specific?
If YES: In what situations do the problem behaviors occur? (Home vs. school, etc.) If NO: Are there specific triggers that cause the problem behaviors? What? |
5. | Has your child's pediatrician been made aware of the problem behaviors?
If YES: Has a biological or medical cause been ruled out? If NO: Consult your child's pediatrician. |
6. | Has psychological testing or an evaluation been conducted?
If YES: Has a diagnosis been determined? If NO: Consider having an evaluation or testing done. |
7. | Has your child recently experienced a dramatic life change? (New sibling, divorce, new school, etc.)
If YES: Find out what you can do to help your child adjust. If NO: Consider other causes. |
8. | Has your child recently experienced a traumatic event? (Abuse, car accident, illness, injury, etc.)
If YES: Assess the need for counseling. If NO: Are you sure? A sudden, unexplained change in behavior could be a sign of unreported abuse. |
9. | Has your child been assessed for learning disorders and/or sensory integration problems?
If YES: Have these problems been ruled out? If NO: Consider having these assessments done. |
10. | Has your child been assessed for developmental and/or neurological disorders?
If YES: Have these problems been ruled out? If NO: Consider having these assessments done. |
11. | Does your child possess adequate social skills?
If YES: Consider other causes. If NO: Practice social skills by discussing or role-playing various social situations. |
12. | Does your child possess adequate coping skills?
If YES: Consider other causes If NO: Teach coping skills to your child and help him or her practice them. |
13. | Is your child's diet conducive to positive behavior?
If YES: Consider other causes. If NO: Cut back on sugar, caffeine, and red food dye in your child's diet. Provide foods that are healthy. |
14. | Is your child's environment conducive to positive behavior?
If YES: Consider other causes. If NO: Provide a clean, organized, quiet, non-chaotic environment for your child. |
15. | Does your child spend time with individuals that are negative influences?
If YES: Encourage your child to spend time with positive individuals. If NO: Consider other causes. |
16. | Is your child easily influenced by violence in the media?
If YES: Monitor your child's viewing and gaming habits more closely. If NO: Consider other causes. |
17. | Is your parenting style too harsh or too passive?
If YES: Consider changing your parenting style or taking parenting classes. If NO: Consider other causes. |
18. | Is your style of discipline inconsistent, unstructured, or unpredictable?
If YES: Consider taking parenting classes or implementing a structured discipline program. If NO: Consider other causes. |
19. | Do you model positive and appropriate behavior?
If YES: Consider other causes. If NO: Be a better role model. Teach good charactertraits and positive social skills by example. |
20. | Do you have a tendency to "give in" to your child's crying, tantrums, or demands?
If YES: You may be reinforcing the problem behaviors. If NO: Consider other causes. |
21. | Are you and your partner "on the same page" when it comes to discipline?
If YES: Consider other causes. If NO: Work with your partner to develop a consistent and effective discipline plan. |
22. | Have YOU ever been evaluated for anxiety disorders, personality disorders, or any other problems that could affect your ability to be an effective parent?
If YES: Consider how your actions might be contributing to your child's problems. This is more common than you might think. If NO: Consider other causes. |
23. | Does your child act out to get attention?
If YES: Ignore minor misbehavior and give attention to positive behavior. If NO: Consider other causes. |
24. | Does your child act out to gain power and/or control over others?
If YES: Offer you child choices more often. Seek professional help to find out why your child has such a need for power/control. If NO: Consider other causes. |
25. | Does your child act out because he or she is bored?
If YES: Encourage your child to participate in extracurricular activities. Spend more time with your child. If NO: Consider other causes. |
26. | Is your child using or abusing drugs or alcohol?
If YES: Seek professional help. If NO: Consider other causes. |
27. | Do you or your spouse ever put drugs or alcohol ahead of your parental responsibilities?
If YES: Seek professional help. If NO: Consider other causes. |
28. | Have you contacted a mental health center or support group to solicit the help you need?
If NO: Consider doing so. |
29. | Have you sought the advice of friends or relatives to help you with your parenting issues?
If NO: Consider doing so. |
Notice: The content of this page is based upon my own personal opinions. I realize that it is simple and brief, but I wanted parents to explore the many factors that could be influencing their child's negative behavior. |